The New Scoreboard’s Here! The New Scoreboard’s Here!

Starting with tomorrow’s Sky Sox game against Round Rock at Security Service Field at Mile, it’s out with the old scoreboard (the football stuff was always so confusing):

 

And in with a fancy, new one:

 

Damn! That looks fast!

 

Between innings you are invited to join the dance party as the scoreboard transforms into an all-robot band and cranks out the hottest soft rock hits of the 80’s!

 

It’s also rumored that VIP Ape, sponsored by Banana City, may make an appearance to flip the switch to light up the new scoreboard!

Free ticket vouchers are available at ARC Thrift Stores! Bring the kids! It’s going to one hell of a Monday at the ball yard!

It’s Not Bigfoot

Can you guess who this warmly dressed, yet still very cold Sky Sox player is?

Out of the correct guesses, one guesser will be randomly selected to win a PengoSports’ Tim Dillard nut-shot baseball card.

 

Pain Is In The Air

Dudes have been getting smacked all over Security Service Field at Mile High this season.

Here a missed pickoff attempt connecting with an umpire’s shinbone –

 

Fresno’s Juan Centeno catches one right in the mask –

 

Here’s a ball twacking Sacramento catcher Tim Federowicz –

 

And this guy got whacked so hard I think he died or something –

So, bring the kids! Watch some dudes get smacked by a baseball! It’ll be fun!

Because This Is How You Get Ants

On April 10th, the Sky Sox called up the world’s most dangerous secret agent/relief pitcher, and star of the hit FXX show, ARCHER, Sterling Tristan Archer.

 

Since being called up from Biloxi, Archer has been in 2 games, pitched 3 innings, allowing zip-all with 3 k’s.

According to his Wikipedia page, Tristan’s obsessions include Burt Reynolds, Kenny Loggins, and big cats such as tigers and ocelots. His biggest fears are: cyborgs, alligators, crocodiles, and brain aneurysms.

The more you know!