The Ghost Of The 2020 Season Opener

UCHealth Park, in 2019, on a dark and stormy night

Today was supposed to be opening day for the 2020 Pioneer League season. Our Rocky Mountain Vibes were traveling to Ogden, Utah to take on the Raptors. Well, thanks to the COVID-19 pandemic, the 2020 season looks to be one of what might have been, for the Vibes, the Rookie Advanced Pioneer League, and all of Minor League baseball (hell, maybe even MLB).

Betcha Ogden has a bitchin’ giant ball of twine for tourists to gawk at

At least we have 2021 to look forward to..shit.

Jorge Bonifacio’s Going To Mess Up Your Promo

The Omaha Royals Storm Chasers Kansas City Royals outfielder, Jorge Bonifacio, is a pip I tell you! A pip!

Here’s some kid, running with a giant, red ball, as part of some promo at a Colorado Springs Sky Sox game, getting his fair share of “the business” from Bonifacio.

A good time was had by both. The kid won a year’s supply of giant, red balls, and Bonifacio made it safely to his position in right field.

Congrats to Jorge Bonifacio, who was called up to the Kansas City Royals today. Good luck and keep on keepin’ on!

Stop That! Just Stop That Right Now!

Would you look at Memphis 3rd baseman Patrick Wisdom? Would you just look at him! He’s freaking out the Brewers’ #1 prospect, Lewis Brinson, and Sky Sox 3rd base coach, Ned Yost, with all that touchy/grabby stuff he’s pulling over there.

 

Seeing the error of his ways, Wisdom attempts to “wash” his “sinning” hand clean with some dirt.

 

OH MY GAWD! HE’S AT IT AGAIN!

Betcha he’ll be wearing a pair of glasses during today’s game. Won’t someone please think of the children.

Sweatpants Santa

Look Kids! It’s Santa Claus!

Sox close out 2016 home slate with 4-0 win over New Orleans

Oh! That jolly old elf was hanging out at the Sky Sox spreading some Christmas cheer in September!

Sox close out 2016 home slate with 4-0 win over New Orleans

Wait a minute! What the hell is Santa wearing?! Are those AND1 brand sweatpants?

Sox close out 2016 home slate with 4-0 win over New Orleans

Yup. Dumpy-assed AND1 sweatpants. Dammit Santa! You ain’t even trying anymore!

Sox close out 2016 home slate with 4-0 win over New Orleans

And that’s not even a Santa coat. That’s just a sweat shirt. My world is crumbling down around me.

Sox close out 2016 home slate with 4-0 win over New Orleans

Buddy the Elf was right, you truly do sit on a throne of lies Santa.

Dugout Parking Is For Kidnapper Vans Only

After failing to kidnap anyone the last time, creepy dugout ball guy was back on Saturday. This time he fancied-up the ball with a little hat:

Sox stop Express 5-4

Betcha the next time he tries he’ll just tape a puppy to the damn ball. Remember kids, nothing is free in this cruel world (except candy from strangers. That’s usually free and comes with the bonus of a ride in a bitchin’ Scooby-Doo van!)

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Oh Hail No!

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Our intrepid bunch of ballplayers battled back against an epic storm Thursday night and defeated Mother Nature (and the Iowa Cubs) 11-7. To paraphrase Winston Churchill, “the Sky Sox shall fight in Colorado, they shall fight on the ball fields and off, they shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength, they shall defend Security Service Field at Mile High, whatever the cost may be. They shall fight in the parking lot, they shall fight in the stands, they shall fight on the warning track, they shall fight in the dugout; they shall never surrender (because they’re too stupid to quit #TSTQ).” Here is Yadiel Rivera, Manny Pina, Brent Suter & Keon Broxton’s tale in pictures (with special guest appearances by Jorge Lopez and Tim Dillard):

But wait! Yadiel Rivera was not finished! Time to bat some hail straight to hell before being called up to the Brewers:

Our Sky Sox did what the Air Force’s E-4B Nightwatch couldn’t…

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…chase this damn storm away and allow everyone to go home at a reasonable hour.

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Run! Pitchers! Run!

Relief pitchers don’t do much except sit around in the bullpen, sneak back into the clubhouse & pitch  Here are a few examples of relievers doing other stuff:

Ariel Pena coaching first base:

Sox sweep Omaha

Look at all the awesome stuff I found!

Occasionally they get to hit. Here’s Jaye Chapman laying down a bunt:

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Chapman reached, moved to 2nd, and then it was time to RUN! PITCHER! RUN!

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SCREAM! SCREAM AT THAT BALL!

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Why is he running so fast?

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Because he just killed that shortstop. He’s running from the law now.

Run like the wind Jaye! Run to freedom!

 

And sometimes they get lucky and are called on to pitch run:

Sox split a pair with Iowa

Orlando Arcia gives Ariel Pena a bit of base-running advice,

“don’t get picked off. Don’t run into any outs. Don’t screw up too bad.”

Sox split a pair with Iowa

Got it boss. The Pena-Jet is ready to roll!

Sox split a pair with Iowa

Time to stretch that lead. S-t-r-e-t-c-h it real good!

Sox split a pair with Iowa

THERE! HE! GOES!

(He didn’t go anywhere. Someone made the 3rd out elsewhere).

Well done gents. Keep running.

 

What The Hell Was That?

In Monday’s 5-4 win over Salt lake, Josmil Pinto scored in the 4th inning to tie the game at 4. His high-five with Orlando Arcia was, um, interesting.

Sox eat the Bees 5-4

High five for you!

 

Sox eat the Bees 5-4

HIGH FIVE! wait. What the?

 

Sox eat the Bees 5-4

Hey. That’s no moon high five. That’s a space station your middle finger.

 

Sox eat the Bees 5-4

Dude. Really?

ORLANDO ARCIA SMASH!

Here’s a little story about Sky Sox shortstop, and Milwaukee Brewers top prospect, Orlando Arcia (yes, he is the real deal) and his bat:

Sox eat the Bees 5-4

Bat hits ball. Ball goes up…too high…

 

Sox eat the Bees 5-4

…BAD BAT! YOU GO BOOM!

 

Sox eat the Bees 5-4

BOOM!

 

Sox eat the Bees 5-4

Bat tries to say it’s sorry and jump back into Orlando’s hands.
Orlando is still too mad at bat.

 

Sox eat the Bees 5-4

Orlando leaves bat behind. Bat is sad. Bat is lonely.
Bat was a bad bat. Bat feels shame.

 

These Are Okay

When I’m good I’m okay, when I’m bad I’m also okay. I may be the okayest guy you’ll ever know. Here are several okay shots from this season:

Sox come back to top Round Rock 6-4

I count 6 peoples. That’s filling the frame!

 

Sox come back to top Round Rock 6-4

A PengoSports salute to feet.

 

Sky Sox walk it off over Nashville on Orlando Arcia's 3 run home run

Um. Somebody is out, or safe.